Happy Valentine's Day!
Also known as... the day of expectations. The day filled with kisses, showers of candy, presents, bows, wish lists, pink & red, love, puppies, jewelry, and oodles of gushy, romantic Hallmark cards.
Obviously Valentine's Day isn't my favorite holiday. I wouldn't say I dislike it by any means, I just don't typically choose to go all-out and celebrate it.
I think it's because I've been that girl too many times in my life. That girl who gives people expectations of what they're supposed to give me or how they're supposed to act on this "special day." That girl who has broken up with not one, but TWO boyfriends on V-day (... terrible, I know). That girl who felt "disappointed" when the day didn't go as planned. That girl who is absolutely no fun to be around whatsoever.
So a few years ago, I decided to stop being that girl—because truly, she was miserable, even for me to deal with!
These days, I take each day as it comes. I'm learning to worry less and be a little more carefree. I'm learning to let go of expectations. I'm living how I want to live, not necessarily how the media/culture these days says I should live. I've found a happy place and it's so great to finally be here.
Anyway, Happy Valentine's Day. Wishing you lots of love—without all the expectations—on this truly special day. Aren't they all? ♥
26 comments:
I love the sentiment of your post-- my thoughts exactly. :)
Happy Valentine's Day!
xx Kelly
Sparkles and Shoes
Awww... I'm sorry you've had some bad Valentine's Days. :( I totally agree with you that Valentine's Day has far too many expectations and it can be SO disappointing. I think we should tell the people that we love that we love them ALL year, not just on a silly holiday. I hope your day is filled with love. XOXO.
www.shannonheartsblog.com
As much as I love Valentine's Day, you are so right! I gave up my expectations years ago, when I realized that we wouldn't necessarily get to spend the day together every year. No gifts, just spending time together...that's all we need :) Hope you have a great day my dear! xoxo
I have never cared for this day - I've never had too many expectations, and found a husband that didn't care about it much. And then....i had a baby ON Valentine's Day. That changed my perspective for sure! I'm even more annoyed by Valentines because not only am I trying to celebrate the birth of my child (which, by far, was one of the best things to ever happen to me), I'm also charged with celebrating the 17 children he goes to school with, his teacher, and I'm pretty sure a few dogs. AHHH! He doesn't seem to mind, but I sure wish the day was just....his. It is in my mind!
My husband and I truly feel that Valentine's Day should be about family, or spreading love to those who lost a loved one, don't have someone to share their day with, etc. I would love to be showered with flowers, candy, jewelry...but we're focused on paying off debt and I'd really feel bad about the price tag knowing the money could have affected us positively in our journey towards being debt free! I'm so glad you had the courage to mention this, because I too have been a girl with many expectations, only to be let down and create misery for anyone I came into contact with. Happy Valentine's Day :)
Happy Valentine's Day right back at you, Kelly. Thanks!
Haha, honestly all the bad ones I've had have been MY fault! Wishing you tons of love today, too!
Agreed!! Time is so precious... never want to take it for granted ;)
Oh no! I never thought about that. I love the idea of dedicating your efforts on V-day to him. That is so special.
I definitely don't mind a little extra love on Valentines, but I used to be that girl too. Now I decided to be the person that makes those expectations happen for my lover man. I love surprising him with gifts and taking him out to dinner. It's kind of a fun new take on Valentines. :) Happy Valentines!!
I love that you aren't expecting anything even when you have someone special to celebrate with. As a gal who's on year #21 of being single on Valentine's Day, it's really nice to find someone who doesn't have to gush about it! Hope you have a fantastic one, love ya!
My husband and I actually got snowed in for V-Day (somehow I arrived the year Japan decided to have its worst winter weather... go figure) but we didn't have plans anyway. He apologized for not getting me anything, and that's when I told him that Valentine's Day wasn't really anything to me. If we were to go out, I'd be having a "special" dinner... with every other couple out celebrating that day. That usually just means long waits at restaurants and having to share a day of affections with the thousands of others who are doing the exact same thing. Then there's the show-and-tell time on Facebook that night where everyone posts pictures of their chocolates, jewelry, and flowers. How original! Ugh. No thanks.
However, I did tell him that if he didn't do anything for our anniversary, he'd be in deep trouble. ;)
My family and I have been doing the Dave Ramsey plan for years now, and let me tell you, it might suck sometimes, but it's worth it! When my parents started it, I was a junior in high school with a brand new car (Actually, my third new car as I got a new one each year from 15-17), and it was real difficult to give up that lifestyle, but I sucked it up, got a used Volkswagen Beetle that my parents paid cash for, and a year later, my dad was yelling I'm debt free on Dave Ransey's radio show! It was an amazing moment! We have seen him twice live since, and I took his baby step classes at my church at college along with reading the book:) Keep at it! My parents are gonna be debt free on the new house they built in 5 years...As for me, I'm budgeting it up, and using the start of my Air Force AD career as an Airborne Linguist to kick start my saving. Sold my car, and gonna live the bike life for my first enlistment! Gotta take advantage of my over 2 year tech school to save save save!!
If I were to write a Vday post, it would be just like this. I was that girl for many years but after finally not getting anything I just say "I just want to be in the day" and this year was great.
Hope you had a great day Aunie!
We tend to keep things low key for Valentine's Day. Getting a sitter is a pain and crowded restaurants aren't romantic. I don't wear a ton of jewelry and I might be known as a penny-pincher so I don't get enjoyment from receiving over-priced flowers. Instead I usually make cute things for the kids, and then dinner at home together as a family. This year we all snuggled on the couch and watched a movie together after dinner. I want my boys to see it as a day to tell ALL the people in their life how much they care about them.
I am the anti-Valentine's Day girl. My husband isn't allowed to do anything for me on Valentine's Day just because of all the expectations. Instead, it's my day to spoil him. We don't go out, we don't do anything fancy, we just stay around the house and I break out some of my wanna-be-gourmet-chef skills. Take that, Hallmark. Now when it comes to anniversaries, he's claimed those as his big days for le grande gesture, and I'm okay with that :)
Now that's the way to do it! Props to you, Miki!
Thanks, girl :) I think it takes the pressure off that much more when you have someone. Especially when we are very upfront that we aren't going to be getting each other anything and the other shouldn't expect anything. That's the biggest thing--communication. It makes everything so much easier :)
Haha, anniversaries are YOUR special day, so that's totally no problem. We celebrated our first anniversary in a very special way, too... but special for the two of us, not with the rest of the world. And ditto to the FB show and tell. I just skipped looking at FB for a few days to avoid it :)
Oh my gosh!!! How amazing. I've heard of people doing the debt-free scream, but you have first-hand lived it. That is so awesome. And I love how you're applying the principles to your life now. I think beginning your first enlistment as a bike commuter will be so perfect. Wish I could do that! Kudos to you... so glad you shared your story with me :)
Perfect! Happy Valentine's Day to you, Cody :)
That's a beautiful way to look at it. I think my celebration part of it may change as we grow and have children. It will be fun to make little treats & things for the kids :) What a great point of view, Julie!
Ditto!! Except I don't have any gourmet chef abilities, so I just do my best at whipping up a classic bowl of ice cream or something :)
Happy Valentines Day Aunie.
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